The Agenda:

Testing the Premise: Are Gays a Threat to Our Children?

What the "Dutch Study" Really Says About Gay Couples

Federal Hate Crime Statistics: Why The Numbers Don't Add Up

Refuting Christianity Today

  Favorites:

Still Life At Sunset

Anderson Cooper and Scooter

Wandering, Wondering

The Aperture of Memory

Easter's Birthday

The First Time I Cussed

  Photo Essays:

The Anasazi Ruins of Chaco Canyon, New Mexico

Monsoons of 2004

Miracle Mile

Now Showing / Reflection on Hayden, Arizona

Dinner for One
Wednesday, November 30, 2005

It's gratifying to see a stone-cold heart melting into a loving cauldron of some sort of lovey-cauldron-soupy thing.

Whatever. Take my sister-in-law, Jen.

I told you earlier about a present that Mom gave me and Chris to put on the front porch when we visited last October. It's a statue of a saguaro cactus by a one-armed chainsaw artist from Kentucky.

Again, I repeat, I am not making that up.

It is a lovely piece of work, one that I hope one day to display proudly in our home. Maybe next to a toilet bowl in the front yard with tulips growing out of it. 

On second thought, maybe not. One of our neighbors already has one of those.

Anyway, someday, I'll have it in a place of honor, but not now. It was too large and heavy to pack on the flight home, and we weren't able to get to a Mailboxes Etc. to ship it, so we did the next best thing: We left it in John's and Jen's loving care. Of course, they weren't at home when we did it, but what else could we do?

Yes, I know. Jen warned us, "If I find that thing in my house I'm walking it to Tucson!"

But still. It's cute, in a misshapen handicapped-puppy kind of cute. And I knew that my faith in Jen would not be misplaced.

They have sent us two updates on the young life of our cactus, and it looks like it has made itself at home. I miss it, and would love for it to be here with me, but I can rest easy, knowing that it is well cared for and – dare I say it? – loved!

Launch!
Thursday, November 17, 2005

Last night, Don Irwin, who I know from work (and I am so happy to be a qualified name-dropper now), and a slew of his friends launched a great new magazine called Outlook Arizona. In the premier issue, he writes:

This is a crucial time for our community in Arizona and in America. Being gay has almost become popular. We're out and open in mainstream America. TV successes like Will & Grace have made it fashionable to be gay or to have a gay friend. Companies are offering domestic partner benefits to remain competitive for critical talent.

Combine this widespread acceptance with apathy and we become our own worst enemy. Don't assume the comfort of where we are now for the comfort we might have in the future. Politics are dynamic. Ensuring we secure and maintain the rights we deserve will take ACTION from all of us.

Don seems to have assembled quite a talented staff to put together the premiere issue. Great design, great writing, great photography. A class act throughout. His idea was to publish a magazine for all of the gays and lesbians in the state who don't hang out in bars. Let me add my voice to the chorus: It's about time!

Red Candle
Wednesday, November 9, 2005

I had a dream last night. I dreamt that I was visiting an old city where I came across a beautiful church. I went inside and saw that it was an amazing old church, the kind they don't build anymore. I looked around, taking in the majesty of the beautiful building as a Mass was going on. I heard the words “intrinsically disordered” over the loudspeakers, and I turned to look at the congregation. Some of them were looking at me, with a half bored, half-disapproving look. I turned and looked toward the front of the church, where I saw the tabernacle.

Catholic churches have a tabernacle where the consecrated host is kept. Next to that tabernacle, there is always a tall candle that sits inside a holder made of red glass. That candle is always burning, signifying the presence of Christ, His presence in the Eucharist in the tabernacle. Anytime you see a tabernacle candle, it is always lit. Except for this one. This candle wasn't lit. Christ was not there, so I left.

I went to another church in that old city, one that was just around the corner from the first church. I went inside and looked around. It too was a beautiful old church, just as beautiful in every way. In fact, it was almost identical to the first one. The choir was warming up and the organist started to intone a few notes on the great pipe organ. People were gathering, -- one by one and in whole families, as well as several couples. And I saw that some of these couples were male couples and some were female couples. They sat all together, gay and straight, some smiling, others praying. I turned towards the front of the church and saw the tabernacle. The red candle was burning brightly. I made the sign of the cross and prayed.

◄ October 2005
► December 2005

About Jen,
Because It Was Her Idea
Wednesday, November 2, 2005

“What are you going to blog about next? People want to know!”

Chris asked me that as soon as I got home from work. It wasn't the first time he's asked that the past few days. And he's not the only one.

We just got back from visiting my family in Ohio for our annual reunion, pig roast, and apple butter stir. We decided to take a full week for the trip. We arrived in Columbus late Friday night, and spend a few days with my brother John and his wife Jen. While there, we drove down to Circleville for the annual Pumpkin Festival.

And what a piece of Midwest Americana that was. Pumpkin chili, pumpkin burgers, pumpkin waffles, pumpkin cheesecake, pumpkin fudge, pumpkin elephant ears, pumpkin everything. More pumpkins of more shapes and sizes than you ever thought possible. Even a pumpkin shaped like a human head.

You think that was bizarre? Dear friends, we're just getting started.

Chris and I then headed down to Portsmouth, picked up my mom, and embarked on a nice leisurely drive through the coal fields of West Virginia to visit my brother and his family in Logan county, site of the Coal Mine Wars of 1921. I have been very fascinated with this little known piece of American history. We enjoyed a nice scenic drive through the mountains during the height of the fall colors, while getting caught up with each other on nothing in particular. We made a loop through Charleston, Danville, Logan, Matewan (where it all started in 1920), and Williamson. We then followed the Big Sandy river back up to Ohio and headed to the reunion in Akron the following Saturday.

We did all of that, but how can I describe all of the other bizarre things we learned along the way? Every family has its unique surprises I suppose, but I had always thought our family was a little on the dull side.

Hah!

The most normal event of the trip happened to be the sculpture that my mom gave me of a saguaro cactus, a piece of Appalachian art from a one-armed chainsaw artist.

I can't make this stuff up.

Jen asked me how we were going to get it back to Tucson. I didn't know, but I suggested that in the meantime it would make a great centerpiece for their dining room table.

“If I find that thing in my house I'm walking it to Tucson.” Which I thought was cool because I've been trying to get them to come and visit for years.

As for the other things, there's not much I can talk about. Not now, anyway, which is too bad because those stories are far more strange and interesting than anything I've related so far. They involve double lives, revealed secrets, strange discoveries thanks to Caller ID and Google, sad circumstances, those sort of things. More skeletons clattered out of more closets and tumbled onto the floor with each passing day. Surprise, tears, heartache, wariness, whispers, they all were in abundant supply. Ethos and Pathos, like unruly children, fought and screamed and pulled each other's hair out. There were no heros. And I, who jokingly refer to myself as the "good child", fell flat.

By the time the week ended, we were exhausted, our heads spinning, our minds a little numb. Finally Jen, who you can always count on the say just the right thing, broke the silence. “Jim, I can't wait to see what you'll blog about next!”

“I know!" she continued. "I think you should blog about me.”

What a great idea.